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Oppenheim, E. Phillips (Edward Phillips), 1866-1946

"The Double Life Of Mr. Alfred Burton"

Do I make myself clear?
"I have no doubt," Burton murmured, "that I shall understand presently."
"Once convince a man," Mr. Bomford continued, "that you are offering
him something which will improve his health, and he is yours, or rather
his money is--his two and sixpence or whatever particular sum you may
have designed to relieve him of. It is for that reason that you see the
pages of the magazines and newspapers filled with advertisements of new
cures for ancient diseases. There is more money in the country than
there has ever been, but there are just the same number of real and
fancied diseases. Mankind is, if possible, more credulous to-day than
at any epoch during our history. There are millions who will snatch at
the slightest chance of getting rid of some real or fancied ailment.
Great journals have endeavored to persuade us that you can attain
perfect health by standing on your head in the bathroom for ten minutes
before breakfast. A million bodies, distorted into strange shapes, can
be seen every morning in the domestic bed-chamber. A health-food made
from old bones has been one of the brilliant successes of this
generation. Now listen to my motto. This is what I want to bring home
to every inhabitant of this country.


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