How changed does this past
time now appear to me! I would act in the watering place an heroic
character, ill studied, and myself a novice on the boards, and my gaze
was lured from my part by a pair of blue eyes. The parents, deluded by
the play, offer everything only to make the business quickly secure;
and the poor farce closes in mockery. And that is all, all! That
presents itself now to me so absurd and commonplace, and yet it is
terrible, that that can thus appear to me which then so richly, so
luxuriantly, swelled my bosom. Mina! as I wept at losing thee, so weep
I still to have lost thee also in myself. Am I then become so old? Oh,
melancholy reason! Oh, but for one pulsation of that time! one moment
of that illusion! But no! alone on the high waste sea of thy bitter
flood! and long out of the last cup of champagne the elfin has
vanished!
I had sent forward Bendel with some purses of gold to procure for
me in the little town a dwelling adapted to my needs. He had
there scattered about much money, and expressed himself somewhat
indefinitely respecting the distinguished stranger whom he served,
for I would not be named, and that filled the good people with
extraordinary fancies. As soon as my house was ready Bendel returned
to conduct me thither. We set out.
About three miles from the place, on a sunny plain, our progress was
obstructed by a gay festal throng.
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